We live in a society that puts so much rules
and restrictions that has no basis but nonsense culture. You need to come home
early .. You need to work in certain jobs .. You need to wear certain clothes
.. You need to behave in a certain manner .. You need to be-freind certain
people .. You need to speak using certain language .. You need to marry in a
certain age .. You must be a housewife or be judged .. You can't share house
chores .. You can't travel on your own .. You must respect the elderly. But of
course, this is a ladies only area .. Let the guys party all around and do sins
.. They don't have to abide by any rules, and they will be accepted or else
forgiven, and life will move on like nothing happened. Really?!!
Well, the funny part is that we think that
these rules are clear-cut to all of us. Well, try to visit a rural area of
Egypt, where it has entirely different interpretations of the same culture and
traditions, and then try to tell me what are those rules that define a society.
We fail miserably to admit that culture is changeable and will always be
subject to personal opinions, preferences and interpretations. And with no law
nor religion, nothing actually defines what is right from wrong precisely. It will
always be personal, and we will always be opinionated and judgmental.
Being an Arab girl, sometimes, is hard to
embrace. There are a million cultural rules for being a girl. And another batch
of rules for being an Arab. Restrictions surrounding us everywhere. Now imagine being both an ARAB and a GIRL living in
a society that treats religion as culture, and culture as religion. Absolute mess. There
are a million things you have to do to get through each day. I used to think
that when I grow up, there wouldn't be so many cultural rules. I was naive. :) Back
in elementary school there were rules about what entrance you used in the
morning, what door you used going home, when you could talk in the library, how
many paper towels you could use in the restroom, and how many drinks of water
you could get during recess. And there was always somebody watching to make
sure you are on 'what they think' is the right track. What I'm finding out
about growing older is that there are just as many cultural rules about lots of
things the same as when I was young, and while there's nobody watching whether
you follow them or not, they will judge you anyways. Lovely, isn't it? :)
I recently came to realize that it is the
beginning of wisdom when you recognize that the best you can do is choose which
rules you want to live by regardless what people think or say. I am still
learning as many rules as I can, so one day I can pick which ones I want to
stick to and which ones I need to break effectively like a pro. I am not yet
bold enough to live life on my terms, or to take the road less traveled. Yet I
know quite well that I am free, no matter what rules surround me. I will fight
for this freedom till the end. If I find these rules tolerable, I tolerate
them; if I find them too obnoxious, I will eventually break them. I am free
because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do. As
simple as this. People are remembered for what they achieve, but most
importantly what and how many rules they break. Many rules are meant to be
broken; pick your battles wisely! :)
#تخاريف #lifetimestruggles
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